AHH!!! AHHHHH!!!!!

I am freaking out!!!! AH!!!!!!!! Holy crap!!!!! I am so pumped and ready to go but I am SO FREAKING SCARED. My heart is beating like 50 beats per second. I. AM. READY. TO. TOTALLY. DOMINATE. WESTBORO.

Except maybe not.

Because I am flipping out.

Like if you were telepathic and read my mind, this is what you hear: "Holy [swear word]! My meets tomorrow! What if I die? What if the car crashes? What if I totally suck? What if WE totally suck? What if" etc. How am I going to go to sleep???

Damn.

Damn post meet jitters.

I have this like paranoid thing. This day-before-meet paranoid thing. Like, I wont go ANYWHERE near a pool, or anywhere near a coach that will tell me how to improve my stroke because I am so freaking paranoid something will mess up and I'll lose my edge.

That has got to be my biggest fear in life.

Losing my edge.

I hate that. It has happened. And it has sucked. But, you know, whats life if it doesnt suck?

Also, the day before a meet, I try not to eat any chocolate, not a lot of dairy stuff, DEFINITELY not cheese, in case I throw up. And I dont do anything dangerous, like jumping off a cliff of bungee jumping or stunt bike riding or whatever. Or little things, like running down the steps, cos I'm afraid I'll trip and fall and break my face.

Paranoid.

I am freaking paranoid.

Oh my [swear word] god, I am SO going to beat the [swear word] out of Westboro.

Sorry about this whole post about my pathetic paranoid self.

Wish me luck.

Next time I post, I'll have either kicked Westboro's sorry [swear word] or they'll have kicked my not-so-sorry [swear word].

One last thing: AH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

--Alex [[is freaking paranoid but still pumped and ready to kick some tush]]

P.S. Sorry bout all the swear words. Comes with my anxiety, I guess. At least I censored them.